She had her clique of girls but God help you if you weren't in it because she could be quite the mean girl. I longed to be accepted by her and even when I saw her around town when I came home from college on summer break I would be just as enamored with her. I sent her a very expensive bouquet of flowers once because I had heard she was dealing with some difficult family matters. She never once said thank you but like a fool I continued to show my allegiance to her. She of course married well, had 3 beautiful little children, & maintained her queen status even in adulthood. Although I am older now and found acceptance & success outside of her presence, I still took great care to stand tall when passing her in the hallway at church because I always revert to that nerdy teenage girl every time I see her.
She bestowed upon me the honor of accepting my Facebook friend request which really only meant that I could torture myself by looking at hundreds of pictures featuring her perfect life. She has only commented on two or three of my posts in the two years that we have been Facebook buddies and those were actually comments I had tweeted about the reality show The Bachelor. I can't blame her for that because my comments are rather witty & probably more entertaining than the show itself (or so I'm told by one of my college professors who also enjoys them, yes that is very strange). Then came April 22nd. I received a notification that someone new had commented on my post so I pulled up my little page and I saw a comment from "A". The comment she left read "Seriously you are a style master! I'm totally jealous!" I couldn't believe it. To have someone of her caliber give me a compliment like that made me feel like I could conquer the world....well the fashion world in a small Midwestern town.
Ironically enough, just 3 weeks after the epic comment I found out that she had decided to leave our congregation over a series of petty issues that were originally the petty issues of her closest friends. They had all gone to a new church across town and took pleasure in posting passive aggressive comments every Sunday about wonderful everyone was there and that they were so glad to be a part of an accepting community. A very close friend of mine left our congregation a few months prior but she & her family left quietly & never spoke an ill word about anyone & quite honestly they would have been well in their right to do so given the circumstances. They also knew that it would not have been fair as the issue only concerned a few people and leaving was truly one of the most difficult decisions she has ever made. They found a new church home that is a great fit for their family but that was only after several months of trying out different ones in the area. "A" tried out two churches which both were occupied by the petty friends. She then shared how glad she was to have found a new church home after an entire 2 weeks of searching. She too now shares how much better her new church is along with the others. It was in that moment that I realized how shallow she remains to be. I am glad to have finally accepted this fact after 15 years of wasting my energy trying to impress her but unfortunately it has tainted the compliment.
Lucky for me I know that I am still pretty fashionable even if I have to say so myself which I generally do. Now I am waiting for a truly epic compliment which I now believe should come from the J.Crew goddess herself Jenna Lyons. She is the president & creative director of the company and lives in New York so I'm not exactly sure how I would just happen to bump into her & get such a compliment. Hmmm....pricing flights to New York as we speak & dreaming big.....
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