31st Birthday

Please take note that I did not entitle this blog entry Happy 31st birthday because I'm not particularly happy about it but I can't stop it from happening. All the milestone birthdays I looked forward to have passed so now I'm just getting older with no real purpose. I can legally drink and rent a car. What's left? My birthday fell on a Thursday this year and there was no way in hell that I was going to spend the day at work so 3 months ago I scheduled to take Thursday  and Friday off to "celebrate" my birthday. Last year for my birthday I spent the day at the Four Seasons St. Louis Spa and had such an amazing experience I decided that this must be an annual occurrence. If you want to take measures to ensure your birthday doesn't suck you simply must take matters into your own hands. Never plan a surprise party for yourself because it will be a disaster and everyone that attends will only complain behind your back about how narcissistic you are. If you leave it up to your friends they will likely plan a random outing that turns into more of a roast than a celebration or they may completely forget about your birthday all together. I found that spending the day in seclusion works best because you'll get exactly what you want and you don't have to fake having a good time when your really miserable.

This year when I called to book my services I found that they now offered a special 3 hour birthday spa package that included a creme brulee butter cream body treatment, a 50 minute massage, and a butter cream pedicure. And yes it cost as much as you think it did but don't judge my splurge. I arrived at the spa 30 minutes early so I could wade in the relaxation pool before my treatments began. I was feeling particularly brave that day so I put on my cute little yellow skirted J. Crew bikini and covered myself in a robe. I went out into the co-ed area of the spa where the pool is located and found that it was completely empty. I couldn't ask for a better scenario. I threw off my robe and climbed into the pool where I enjoyed 30 minutes of peaceful floating in warm cucumber infused water overlooking a beautiful view of downtown St. Louis.

I put in a call to room service to request that a glass of Moscato be brought up to the spa for me just as Emily my favorite esthetician came to get me for my eyebrow wax. Confession, I was a waxing virgin until I met Emily a year ago. My pedicurist made a comment gently suggesting that my eyebrows were unruly so naturally I freaked out about it. On one of my spa trips last year I had Emily work in a lip, chin, & eyebrow wax with my European facial because I figured they probably had the best estheticians in the world there and believe me they do. She waxed those puppies into shape and I loved the way they turned out. Now I have an aversion to going to anyone else because I'm terrified that they will take too much off. Emily knows my brows so intimately! Anyways, after she tortured my eyebrows into the perfect shape she led me back out to the relaxation area where she brought me my glass of Moscato and I enjoyed every last sip. There is something so glorious about drinking at 11:30 am on a weekday. This must be what Ke$ha's life is like. While I was sipping on wine and waiting for my next treatment I checked my cellphone and found that I received a birthday text from my ex. More about that in just a moment.

Monica came exactly at noon to get me for my body treatment and massage. Monica was my masseuse the last time I came to the spa a few months back and she is easily one of the nicest people I have ever met and she is very passionate about wellness. I sent her a thank you card after my visit last time and she remembered and took the time to let me know. Not only did she make sure to bring me a special robe that said "Birthday Girl" on it, she reserved one of the couple treatment rooms for me which was a big deal because those are the best rooms in the spa. They are ridiculously spacious and even have a separate shower and seating area in the room so that you don't have to walk back through the spa and to the locker room to rinse off. After my body treatment I got to use the shower in the room which had dual shower heads on the ceiling and the sides of the wall. That shower could have easily held a family of 6 with room to spare. After a brief lounge on the super comfy couch in the seating area, I enjoyed my massage so much I actually fell asleep during it. I was then escorted to my butter cream pedicure by a lovely manicurist named Kat where I picked a pink sparkly polish (of course) and was treated to a large red velvet cupcake made especially for me. I emerged from the spa a new woman plucked, scrubbed, & completely refreshed. Those people really know how to pamper a girl on her birthday.

So back to the text from hell. The text itself seemed very sincere on the surface but let's face it anything that can open up the wound of rejection must have been sent from Satan himself. The text said "For some reason the song Man Like That by Gin Wigmore makes me think of U, LOL! Happy Birthday". I acknowledged that I like that song and said thank you. To that he replied "I'm sure you will have a great day of awesomeness. Thanks for never disappointing :)" I was too busy having a fabulous day of relaxation that I didn't even register what he said so naturally I waited until the next day to really dissect his text messages. If you've never heard this song it's basically a woman educating her ex's new plaything about all the shady things he will likely end up doing to her. I believe he's reminded of me when he hears this song because I was known in our group of friends as the one who would dole out sensible man advice to co-workers who were married to or in love with douchebags. The guy I hooked up with last night at the bar hasn't called me back what should I do? Stop being a slut. I found sexy texts on my husbands phone and he comes home smelling like Victoria's Secret Heaven. Is he cheating on me? Yes. Please note those are actual questions I've been asked by women desperate not to be alone. He knows I wouldn't settle for that mess so I guess I haven't disappointed him but the fact that I was ever with him is a major disappointment to me. Receiving any text from the ex just makes things worse and brings me back to that dark place I existed in for months after the breakup. I wish I could tell you that 2 years later I don't ever feel that way when I think about him now but that would be a complete lie. I feel like I should be getting better with this as more time passes but I'm still very much a work in progress.

This week's obsession are the items pictured above that I purchased for myself during a short excursion to J.Crew after my trip to the spa. The polk-a-dot tee was a must have because it includes two of my favorite obsessions things with polk-a-dots and things that are pink. The pink long-sleeved tee is a closet staple that I somehow didn't have. The skirt is a gorgeous lavender piece from their collection line and it has tiny circles on it. There's so much I can do with this I don't even know where to begin. The blue striped infinity scarf was 50% off and I wear scarves pretty much everyday so that was a no brainer. Finally my favorite purchase was the neon pink leather ballet flats. I tried to get these last year but they sold out the second they went on sale. They came out with a slightly different pink color this year and I snatched them up for 35% off so I was pleased. All in all not a bad day.